My husband is great, and I will be the first to point out all of his wonderful qualities.
I often say this, and I honestly mean it, he is the nicest human being (man or woman) that I have ever met. He opens doors for strangers. He does this every time he approaches a door. He looks around, and is aware of who is next to him or close to him, and he holds the door for them.
He feeds the homeless. On Friday mornings he gets up at 5 AM to be at a soup kitchen by 6. He has every other Friday off so on those days he stays and serves the meal at 9. On the days he has to work, he leaves after the food is prepared, and then stays late at work to make up the time.
He remembers how people take their coffee so that he can prepare it for them the next opportunity he has.
He asks me to make 48 cupcakes every month so that his office can celebrate everyone who has a birthday that month.
I don’t think a day goes by that he doesn’t do something for someone. He is generous and thoughtful.
All of these things are true, and much, much more. I definitely married up in class, sophistication, manners, and kindness. However, many people who don’t know my husband say, “Your husband is so special. You are so lucky.”
This comes on the heels of finding out that I have paranoid schizophrenia.
I agree 100%, my husband is special, but when people say that without knowing him, I know exactly what they mean. He is remarkable for marrying and staying married (for seventeen years) to someone who has schizophrenia.
I have days of self-doubt and self-loathing when I ask him why he stays. I would be a liar if I said I never asked him the same question. But on most days, I know why he stays. We are a beautiful fit.
We laugh together, loud and from the belly, almost every day. We both make up songs, and dances, and parade around the house with our pants pulled up to our chests. We enjoy art and architecture. We enjoy talking to each other about ideas, people, places, events, and the details of our days. He thinks I am creative and smart, and I think he is amazingly independent and capable of being a handy man, as well as, a manager. His mind is both technical and practical. He speaks four languages fluently.
We view money the same way. We have the same type of spending habits (we are always looking to save a buck), and I can’t remember ever fighting about our big purchases. We both like to recycle everything including clothes, furniture, etc. and we often shop at thrift stores.
My husband married me for better or for worse. We made the same promises to each other, except I added one thing, I promised him that no two days would ever be the same. He has stuck by me during the worst, and I have provided him with a constant variety that enriches his life in a way no one can understand. Yes, he is special, and I am lucky, but he has had his fair share of luck too. He married his best friend, and biggest fan; those things outweigh schizophrenia.