My blog is about my experience with schizophrenia, an experience I invite others to witness. I am by no means a professional, and I don’t have any scientific answers about schizophrenia.
I read all the research articles I can (many contradict each other) and I read books, blogs, articles, essays, etc. by scientists, caregivers, spouses, children, and other people with schizophrenia. I subscribe to as many outlets for information as I can, but even with all that, my experience with this illness, is my experience.
No two people have the exact same symptoms, life, treatment outcomes, capabilities, intellect, creativity, etc. We are all very different. I can only speak for myself and my life.
The things I write here are true for me, but they may not be true for others. I don’t know anyone with schizophrenia that has the illness in the exact same way as I do. I also don’t know anyone with schizophrenia who has the same life experiences I have and have had that may or may not have contributed to my developing a full blown mental illness.
I have a cousin who battles her illness far more fiercely than I have to at this current stage in my life.
I know other people who hear voices with or without medication. I have read about people that receive the best treatment and still have hallucinations.
So, when you read about me and my experience, please don’t forget that I’m not an expert.
I have been psychotic, and I can describe what it is like to be psychotic in detail. I have heard voices, and I can tell you what that is like. I have thought I was Jesus. I have thought I was a healer with great power. I have thought I was being tape recorded by the government. I have thought that China was taking over the world. I have tried to kill myself because voices told me to, and I have been in psych wards.
All of these things are true and I can write to you about them, but I can’t make any sweeping statements that are true for all people with schizophrenia. Please remember that. It is a complicated illness (they all are) and the way it manifests itself is as varied as people who have it.
I hope you can learn from me, not as an expert, but as a human being.