Tags
acitivist, advocacy, Advocate, essays, heroes, heroine, hope, inpiration, mental health, mental illness, mentally ill, psychiatrist, psychiatry, psychology, schizophrenia, stigma, writing
My husband cooks for and serves the low income and homeless every Friday morning. The non-profit he volunteers for is currently looking to fill the Volunteer Coordinator position so my husband has helped out by doing a few more duties. One of the things he has been doing lately is leading the volunteers in a discussion (like a short meditation) during the time in between cooking and serving the food.
Yesterday the pastor was going to talk about heroes so he asked my husband to ask everyone who their hero was/is. Because my husband was the one directing the discussion, he was the first one to say who his hero is, and while we were sitting there having lunch, he told me that when he thought about his hero, he realized it is me.
In a restaurant crowed with people, an avocado, tomato, grilled cheese sandwich in front of me, tears streamed down my face as my husband told me why I am his hero. “Every day, every single day, you get up and you fight. You have to fight to overcome so much. You fight and you write, and you make a difference. I can’t imagine how hard it is. You are my hero, and I realized it for the first time today.”
I can’t tell you what it is like for the person you love most in the world to tell you that they think of you not only as a hero, but as their hero.
This girl from a town of five thousand people, this girl from a poor family, this woman with paranoid schizophrenia, yes her, her, her…she is someone’s hero.
I don’t think I am anyone special, and I don’t think I do anything special. I simply live, but now I know that someone who watches me closely, who knows most of my actions, who knows my character intimately, thinks I am a heroine.
If it is possible for me, then it is possible for you. You may be a hero to someone and not even know it yet. What do we need to do? We need to keep on keeping on – we need to push forward. We need to try our best. We need to get back up when we fall. We need to put our former episodes behind us. We need to hope for a brighter future. We need to see beauty in our lives and in our days. We need to meet the challenge of being mentally ill every day, and try to have a warrior’s spirit. We need to take the next step. We need to keep moving past our limitations. We need to smile and hold the thought in our heart that people are looking to us, learning from us, gaining courage from us, and we may be inspiring someone to do something great that changes the world, and we may be changing the world ourselves. Go heroes! Go!
I tried to paste a picture here that I wanted to share with you, but the image wouldn’t stick. Anyway, it’s of an abandoned structure (I’m in love with abandoned places) covered in green foliage. There are quite a few plants that take to uninhabited structures, ivy for one, dandelions, brambles, and others. I got this image in my head when I read what you wrote about leaving “former episodes” behind. The past is gone, empty, but there is life in the lessons, green, medicine, edibles, color. Maybe the painful past, even relationships we’ve abandoned, can be viewed this way. We don’t have to erase them, throw them away; we just need to keep growing over them, edified.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Beautiful! Thanks for sharing.
LikeLike
So very positive post. We need to be the change as we wish to see in our world ourselves. We can’t change other people either, but show them the way and hope that they are ready to learn.
LikeLike
This is so sweet! You are one of my heroes too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love you, Jill.
LikeLike
Your husband is right. I don’t deal with psychosis but things get difficult for me and i know how hard it is for me. Your struggles not only seem to make you stronger, but it brings out a creative and empathic you. Your writing shows the reader who you are and I’ve discovered you are one of my heros too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is so nice, and I thank you so much!!!! 🙂
LikeLike
😀
LikeLike
That’s very sweet. I’m not sure if my wife ever thinks of me as a hero exactly (I’m not very heroic!), but I think she appreciates me as a loving companion, as I appreciate her. Of course, when I use the last slice of bread and forget to mention it, she clearly sees me as the villain.
LikeLiked by 1 person
HA HA HA! That is so funny!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are a source of inspiration for me, Rebecca. Seriously.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!!! That means a lot.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are welcome! 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your husband loves you unconditionally. There is no greater, nor deeper love. You are adorable, and your husband is amazing. ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!!! We are happy with each other. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person