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abled, acitivist, advocacy, Advocate, artists, athletes, balance, bipolar, business, compassion, depression, disabled, equality, essays, future, heroes, hope, inspiration, kindness, mental health, mental illness, mentally ill, psychiatry, psychology, schizophrenia, talent, video, viral, writers, writing
Yesterday when I was browsing through Facebook, there was a video/article posted by The Mighty. The Mighty posted the video (that has gone viral) to ask its members how they feel about the video and how they want The Mighty to handle this type of information in the future (meaning do they want us (as members) to see kindness to disabled people as heroism, or should we expect kindness).
I didn’t answer The Mighty on Facebook, but I couldn’t stop thinking about their question and how I feel about it. Yes, the young man in the video did a very kind thing, but it makes me sad that he is being called a hero for being kind. Have we really become so self-centered and cut off from one another that a decent act between two human beings is considered heroism?
Also, he is being considered a hero for comforting a disabled man. This is one more example, in many, where people without a disability get to take credit for being kind to the “other” “lesser” “needy” And in this way I don’t like it at all.
People without disabilities are seen and heard in every public space and in every room. We see them as the lead characters on television. We see them in every job, and at every dance, and at every restaurant, and at every event. They are in magazines, and newspapers, they are in government and in the boardroom. They are not under-represented or invisible. They are not fighting to get access or be heard. They are front and center in our culture. They are always the heroes.
I want to see disabled heroes. I want to see someone with a mental illness win some of the prestigious writing awards and residencies. I want to see people in wheelchairs as CEO’s and covered on the front of major magazines. I want to see disabled entrepreneurs and artists. And I don’t want them to be great, because they are disabled (like isn’t it amazing that someone with a disability can do this? No.) I want them to be great because they are great. There are many disabled writers, artists, athletes, business people that are worth being spotlighted, because of their accomplishments not because of their disability.
I read an article recently by a disabled young woman and she wrote that “The disabled are not here to inspire you.” I think when considering heroes and success this is important too. Someone with a mental illness isn’t inspirational just because they get out of bed and dress in the morning, or take a shower. The disabled aren’t inspirational just because they have a job.
Disabled people are as competent and talented as anyone else.
When we get to a point when kindness is described as an event between two human beings and not a healthy individual and a “special needs” man, and when we get to the point where the success of the disabled is the norm and not the exception, that is when we have reached a balance and one group isn’t seen by the other as less-than or inspirational just for being.
We have a long way to go.
This is one of your most powerful posts. The fourth paragraph and the quote: “The disabled are not here to inspire you” should be on a t-shirt. I’d wear it in a heartbeat.
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Thank you! Yes, a t-shirt would be great!
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I totally agree. In my country, Sweden, we actually have disable artists who are great and they are loved for what they do. They do standup com, sing and act and create like everyone else in their genre 🙂
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That’s great. We have some too, just not nearly enough. 🙂
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We could have more of them too 🙂
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I had a bit of a similar response to,this video I saw on Facebook: http://youtu.be/R9Tvik9nmV8 . It bothered me that the fellow in the video had a camera all set up before he approached the homeless man. After the video, the man will still be homeless but the “helper” will be a hero for exploiting him for the video. Maybe I am just cynical but it feels pharisaical.
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I agree. There are times it is just so “set up.” The one I posted was shared by someone else on the bus, so it wasn’t planned, but doing the right thing should be something that is the norm and not the exception. Right?
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Yes.
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I blame it on that thing called, Political Correctness. Things have gone too far overboard. Each of us has a talent, it should never be defined by physical attributes.
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I agree, everyone does have a talent(s).
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I couldn’t agree with you more!!!
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Thanks!!! 🙂
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Hi there and thank you for following my blog.
As one who is blind I can identify with this post in a number of ways.
As you probably know, I am in the art community as well, even though it’s a relatively small genre of music by some standards. I’ll never ever be a household name and that’s not my goal since my name is known all too well in the house in which I live now. lol.
The sentence “go see daddy” is used numerically more than I am able to count in my head, and that’s a high number.
I have been told all my life that I am an inspiration and a lot of times, though I cringe on the inside and want to ask the question “Why” I simply say “thank you” because I don’t want to be seen by people as someone who either has a chip on his shoulder and simply can’t accept a compliment, or be viewed as someone who is so angry about his situation that he refuses to see the light of his inspiration to others, if that al makes sense. I don’t know, it may not make a lot of sense, but then, like my music, I rarely think ahead about what I am going to write, I just write it as I go along.
Luckily I haven’t run into one of those stupid people who, if I’m with my kids, they say “isn’t it nice that they take care of you?” and yes, I’ve heard of some blind parents who encounter such idiocy and willful ignorance.
I wrote another post you might like, though I can’t remember exactly where it is so you’ll have to go hunting but the title is something like “it’s okay to be broken” and I talk a bit more about people’s perception of not only my disability, but a little about my depression or, as my therapist form a long time ago said, dysthymia.
anyway, this was a brilliant post and I wanted to share my thoughts and say thanks for posting your thoughts on the matter.
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Thanks for commenting. I like to hear different perspectives on this, because of course, I don’t think of everything, or all the possibilities when I post, so it is helpful to have people add to my writing. I know people don’t mean anything by saying that people with a disability are an inspiration, and I would never be rude either – if your music is good, or my writing is good, it is great to be told that we are inspirational, but just being inspirational for doing the things other people do, doesn’t cut it for me. It sounds like you feel the same way. We have a long way to go in terms of being seen as equals and treated as equals – hopefully people are becoming more aware of how to talk to, and about, those of us with a disability. I don’t even really like the word disabled and wish there was a different word for it, but that is what is commonly used and what people understand. I will check your blog after I do my homework and look for the post you mentioned. Thanks for being here! I appreciate your input!
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Yes exactly!! After all we’re all human.And I have had people look down on me before,guess I have gotten used to it.Sigh.
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Sorry that people have looked down on you. I think we have all experienced that at one time or another.
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