• About

A Journey With You

~ surviving schizophrenia

A Journey With You

Tag Archives: forgiveness

A Nostalgic Christmas

24 Sunday Dec 2017

Posted by A Journey With You in bipolar, caregivers, hope, mental illness, relationships, schizophrenia, Uncategorized

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

childhood, Christmas, family, forgiveness, holiday, hope, love, memories, mental health, mental illness, peace, schizophrenia], songs, wellness

My husband and I are sitting in our robes at our computers, listening to Christmas carols. Today is the first time this season I have heard the Christmas songs I grew up with. The songs are full of emotion for me. It started this morning on Snapchat when one of the filters had a halo and wings, and the song playing was Oh Holy Night. Tears filled my eyes and ran down my cheeks. I heard the same song when I clicked on a link from fellow blogger Outofagreatneed’s Facebook page.

It isn’t the songs about jingle bells, or frosty the snowman, or how cold it is outside that get me; it is the religious songs that get me crying. Those songs were such a part of my childhood, and they bring up the most powerful and wonderful memories. It makes me miss the child I used to be and the young version of all my brothers.

I love my life with my husband and the past twenty years with him have been the best of my life, but I have to admit there are things in my childhood that I miss and that I mourn. I miss having my three older brothers around. I miss believing in Santa Claus and magic. I miss my love of Sunday school, and I miss the simplicity of the 60’s and 70’s. I guess I miss being a kid even though my brothers and I had traumatic and tough things to deal with in our youth.

We attended church every Christmas Eve growing up and every year we sang the same songs. When it was time to sing, The First Noel, my oldest brother, Joel (who is seven years my senior), used to tell all of us younger kids that they were singing the FIRST JOEL. All four of us kids would be belting out “The first Joel, the angels did sing!” Joel would have a huge grin on his face when all of us younger kids loudly sang his name.

Not only do the religious songs bring up memories of my innocence and a simpler time, but they also bring up all the hope I have for my life and the lives of others. The songs remind me of all the best messages of a religion I hold dear: all people are created equal (even if they are homeless or have a mental illness), there is forgiveness for all, there is joy, there is the promise of peace. Not to mention a belief that I will someday see my beloved grandparents, and other people who have passed before me. Equality. Hope. Joy. Forgiveness. Meaning. Eternity. Love. Peace. Not a bad way to focus a troubled mind.

So, as I sing off key and loudly in my condominium this Christmas feeling both triumphant and nostalgic, I hope that a part or a piece of the season I celebrate enters your heart – imagine, equality. Imagine peace. Think love.

Merry Christmas from a very sentimental blogger who dares to hope for a better life for all – next year and all the years to come.

 

Recipe For Long Lasting Love

16 Tuesday Feb 2016

Posted by A Journey With You in hope, Uncategorized, writing

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

caregiving, communication, compassion, forgiveness, fun, future, hope, ingredients, inspiration, joy, laughter, love, mental health, mental illness, mentally ill, recipe, relationship, relationships, silliness, wellness

I wish everyone with a mental illness could find a partner who loves and cherishes them for who they are. Most of the joy I experience in life is from having a relationship with my husband. He provides me stability, endless laughter, and the necessary support to rebuild my life each time it falls apart.

Next month, my husband and I will celebrate our eighteenth wedding anniversary.

Each relationship has its unique recipe and ingredients for making things work. I would say our recipe looks like this:

1 cup forgiveness

1 cup communication

1 cup laughter, silliness, and fun

1 cup hope for the future

1 cup commitment

1 cup support and encouragement for one another

1 cup believing in each other against all odds

1 cup compassion

1 cup caregiving

Mix all ingredients together in a bowl of love. Bake it for as many years as you possibly can – it’s never fully cooked, finished or ready – it is always a masterpiece in progress. You can eat from it year after year, and it will fill you up as it grows larger not smaller with each bite you take.

 

Never Stop Learning

05 Monday Oct 2015

Posted by A Journey With You in hope, writing

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

behavior, changing, compassion, essays, forgiveness, growing, hope, inspiration, learning, mental health, psychology, writing

A group of our friends took us out for Sunday brunch to celebrate my husband’s and my birthdays (I am four days older than him). One of my friends ordered a Pickle Mary. When her drink came, there was a large (one of those big pickles you see for sale in quick stops) pickle sticking out of a very tall and thin glass. When I saw it, I wondered how the drink was going to stand upright.

As I was looking at the Pickle Mary, the server reached across me to place the drink in front of my friend. As I suspected, the drink was top heavy and the whole thing spilled on me. I was wearing a white hoodie that now had tomato juice all over the left sleeve and down the front. My legs were covered in alcohol and tomato juice, and I could feel the liquid seeping all over my chair and wetting my whole bum.

I got up from my seat and the server was of course scurrying around me and the table trying to clean up what little she could. She was red-faced and I assume she was mad at herself and embarrassed because of the accident. I said, “Wow. I am really really soaked, and my jacket is white.” I didn’t get angry. I didn’t scream. I didn’t throw any kind of fit.

I stood in the middle of the restaurant waiting for the people to clean my chair, the floor, the table, and one person was trying to wipe me down. I think I said it again, “I am soaked and I am wearing white.”

Although I didn’t get mad or say anything rude to anyone, I wish I would have handled the situation better. I wish I would have reached out to the server who spilled the drink on me and said, “It’s okay. It doesn’t matter. What is a little tomato juice? Maybe it will be good for my skin.”

I know that it was an accident that the woman spilled the drink on me. I know that she was personally suffering in her own feelings about it and I didn’t use the opportunity to show kindness and compassion. I didn’t try to hurt her, but I didn’t help her either.

Much of what other people do to us is an accident, cutting us off in traffic, running their cart over the back of our feet in the grocery store, not seeing us and cutting in front of us in line, saying something that hurts our feelings. I want to be the kind of person that shows compassion, acceptance, cool-headedness, and thinks of the other person’s feelings, as well as, my own.

It seems there are always lessons to learn when I leave the house and venture out into the world. This time the lesson came in red – tomato juice and a server’s face. I wish that red would have been a cue to me to be as kind as possible. If there is a next time, and there surely will be, I’ll do better.

I’ve always said I am a lifelong learner, and that can mean more than always returning to the classroom. The world is a classroom too, and I am forever a student.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Categories

Top Posts & Pages

  • About
  • The Miracle of a Day
Follow A Journey With You on WordPress.com

A Journey With You

A Journey With You

Social

  • View A Journey With You’s profile on Facebook
  • View @wr8ter’s profile on Twitter
  • View Rebecca Chamaa’s profile on Pinterest

Most Popular Recent Posts

  • wegohealth.zoom.us/webina…

Blog at WordPress.com.