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Tag Archives: growth

A Simple Message and a Writing Group

29 Tuesday Sep 2020

Posted by A Journey With You in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

change, creativity, growth, mental health, post traumatic growth, schizophrenia, writers

There are times when a message so simple, delivered at the right time, can have a profound impact on our lives. I happened upon one of those messages yesterday. During the pandemic, I have tried to spend time working toward healing and bettering my responses to events and circumstances. I have watched every YouTube video by Brene Brown (if you haven’t done this, I highly recommend it). I also bought several workbooks on healing trauma and emotional regulation. Added to that list are two books by Brene Brown (because there can never be too much good advice and great stories).

Anyway, yesterday, while doing a CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) exercise, I ran into an explanation about fixed thinking and labels. Fixed thinking ( like saying, I have a terrible memory, or I am awful at math) doesn’t allow for growth. It leaves the person saying those things stuck. If, on the other hand, a person has an attitude of development, they will try math and try to get better at it, or practice techniques to improve their memory, etc. This type of thinking provides for a change instead of the more rigid fixed thinking.

One part of what I read yesterday was about labels and how labeling ourselves is falling into the trap of fixed thinking. Here is the most important statement that rocked my understanding of my illness and myself. The writer said being diagnosed gives you a label.

These past six years of writing publicly about schizophrenia, I have often tried to get other people to see beyond my diagnosis. I have written how I am a partner, a sister, a friend, an aunt, a daughter, etc. The whole time I was writing those words, I was labeling myself as someone with schizophrenia.

Labeling myself as someone with schizophrenia is fixed thinking. It can cause me to believe that it is something about myself that won’t get better and will never change. How I am today is unlikely to be how I will be tomorrow. I can learn to manage my schizophrenia better. I can learn more coping techniques, and equally important, I can add more interests and hobbies to my life. By adding hobbies or passions to my life, I may find things that I identify with more strongly than having schizophrenia. Having a big and complex life gives schizophrenia that much less meaning. It takes it out of the driver’s seat and puts it in the trunk among all the other odds and ends that get tossed in there.

As an example, I am spending much more time writing during the pandemic, and I am spending much more time teaching three different writing courses. Teaching and writing define much more of who I am than the fixed label of schizophrenia.

To continue along those lines, I want to create a community of writers who meet on Zoom once or twice a week. I would have to charge a small fee to cover costs, but I would make it low enough to be accessible to almost everyone who wants to participate. I have found writing in community has helped me generate many words on the page these last six months. If you are interested in being a part of a writing community please contact me with the days and times that work best. I will post again about this soon. Please get in touch if you want to take part in a powerful writing practice that helps you make writing a central practice in your life. The writing you do can be healing, centering, therapeutic, and spark more and more creativity. Reach out because I would love to have you. 

Are You Hard On Yourself?

06 Saturday Feb 2016

Posted by A Journey With You in Uncategorized, writing

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

Art, artists, books, classes, development, essays, grammar, growing, growth, inspiration, school, success, workshops, writer, writing

My mind plays tricks on me. There are times when I am dozing off to sleep that I will remember a sentence I wrote earlier and the errors in it will stand out like a blue shirt against a white background. “How could I make such a dumb mistake?” I will ask myself.

Because I have already hit the send button to an editor, to a journal or for one of my blogs, I will feel so stupid thinking that the whole world now knows my inadequacies, deficiencies and the gaps in my knowledge of perfect grammar.

During these times, I will get up and check what I have sent. Many times I didn’t make the error I was positive I made. (There are times though when I reread what I sent and am horrified that I didn’t pick up on stupid and simple mistakes).

I am so hard on myself during those times. I feel like I am an imposter who doesn’t deserve the title of writer. I say to myself, “If I can’t get the basics right, how can I consider myself a writer?”

For a while, the punishment I put myself through for making mistakes seems like it will overwhelm me and I will stop writing completely. But in the long run, it is the pressure, the feeling of being an imposter, the desire to call me a writer and feel it, the desire to write something both beautiful and without errors that keep me going to classes and workshops.

I know I am harder on myself than I need to be, but when the initial weight of criticism leaves me, it makes me do more to master the craft. I sign up for another class, I read another book, and I push and push.

I bet many of you are hard on yourselves, too. I find the process of learning new things uncomfortable but my desire to be better than I was a year ago, a month ago, last week, and yesterday keeps me looking for opportunities to learn.

Do you get past the criticism of yourself and look for new avenues to drive down that will lead you to places you thought might be impossible to visit?  If you do, in time we can walk to the door of some cool house and maybe even have the key to getting in.

 

 

My Hierarchy Of Mental Health Advocacy

20 Wednesday Jan 2016

Posted by A Journey With You in bipolar, caregivers, hope, mental illness, schizophrenia, stigma, Uncategorized

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

advocacy, Advocate, Blogging, blogs, growth, homeless, inspiration, mental health, mental illness, mentally ill, politics, progess, writer, writing

This post is a hierarchy of mental health advocacy that I created based on my priorities, development, growth and commitment. I am not at a certain level. I find that I move back and forth through the different phases. This document is a work in progress; it is a living document that I am creating to help me grow as an advocate. Because it is a living document, and I am going to be updating it, feel free to leave comments with information I may have left out or anything that may be helpful to grow this idea.

  1. Advocacy usually begins with the focus on self.

Most people would agree that writing can be therapeutic. There are many blogs and online journals that people write in an attempt to work through their issues. These blogs or journals can also help educate people about the diagnosis the writer is living with, and they can build up a community of people who suffer from the same illness or loved ones who care about someone with the same illness. But primarily these blogs are focused on the writer’s life and thoughts.

  1. The advocate then starts to branch out.

Then there are blogs and online journals that the writer’s goal is to educate. On these blogs, you will find more links to research, news, and things that are happening that go beyond the life and mind of the writer.

  1. The advocate stretches their reach even further.

Then there are writers who blog, write articles, guest posts, do interviews, etc. to spread their influence and further their reach with the hope of educating more and more people.

  1. The advocate becomes interested in national issues regarding mental health.

Then there are people who contact their elected officials and make their voice and opinion known about policies that directly relate to mental health. These people may make regular calls to the offices of their representatives. They may also start online petitions and try to get other people engaged in changing everything from treatment to stigma.

  1. The final stage is service to others.

Then there is service; getting completely outside of one’s experience to reach out and help others. This service might be starting a non-profit, volunteering at NAMI, helping the homeless, etc.

 

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